Another wasted day

I was relaxing in my backyard, reading the latest issue of Popular Hijinks, when God showed up.

God said, “Hey, you wanna hang out?”

I said, “What did you have in mind?”

God said, “Backgammon.”

I said, “Okay. Did you bring a board?”

God said, “I thought you have one?”

I said, “I don’t have one.”

God said, “What are we gonna do?”

I said, “You’re God, make one appear.”

God said, “That’s not how I work.”

I said, “But you’re God.”

God said, “So.”

I said, “What’s the point of being God if you can create things out of nothing?”

God said, “Sorry. We can go to the store. Would you drive?”

I said, “This is my day off. I was hoping to take it easy and not go out.”

God said, “Pleeeeeeeese.”

I drove God to the store. I was in a bad mood the whole way there and back. We played. God won. I got upset and tipped over the board.

God said, “Why’d you do that?”

I stormed into my house and slammed the door. I laid down on the couch and stared at the ceiling

God tapped on my living room window. I didn’t look. God tapped again. Then again.

Finally I looked. God shrugged and made a funny face up against the glass.

I got up and closed the curtains.