You again

Hi. Last night I dreamnt you were clearing your throat so I would notice you. The thing is you weren’t in the room. So I looked out the front window but I didn’t see you in the yard.

I heard you clear your throat again, but from higher. I looked up into the sky and saw you waving at me from a cloud.

I opened the window and shouted, “What?”

You yelled, “Do you want to go for a ride?”

I asked where you were going.

You said, “Around.”

I said yes. I got up on the roof. You lowered the cloud and I got on. As we rode around, we ate pieces of the cloud.

It was licorice!

Seeking distinction

I took my time-travel machine back to the second day of time. Rocks were flying by in a propulsion effusion from the previous day’s Big Bang.

I asked one large rock where it was heading.

The large rock said, “I’m hoping to find a galaxy where I can reside as a planet of great distinction.”

I asked by what name it would be called.

The large rock said, “Urth.”

I said that was where I had time-traveled from.

The large rock said, “Tell me, am I to be as great as I aspire to be?”

I said yes, but that the planet would go unnoticed because it would be populated by peoples that were also aspiring to be noticed.

Helping Out

The Sun said, “Hey!”

I looked up and said, “What?”

The Sun said, “Do you like my illumination?”

I said, “Are you feeling insecure?”

The Sun said, “Yes. I could really use some praise and encouragement.”

I said, “Well, first of all, I’m stunned that people aren’t walking around going, ‘Oh, my God, there’s a wondrous burning ball of sun in the sky!’ Second, I’m so glad that I don’t have to ask you to show up. You come to work even if there are clouds in the sky. Third, if you weren’t doing your job, I wouldn’t be able to see the amazing trees and stuff…Are you feeling better?”

The Sun said, “Yes, yes, yes! Thank you soooo much! I really mean it!!”

Following

I was walking across the desert.

The Sun said, “Are you following me?”

I said that I was.

The Sun said, “What would you do if you caught up to me?”

I said, “Wild and impetuous things.”

The Sun said, “Well, you’d better hurry up then.”