I was walking around my apartment and ended up behind the open door, looking at the door jamb. I’m not good at backing up, so I spent a few hours, just standing there.
It was at that time that my dog Rexy found me and helped me away from the jamb.
Rexy said, “You could have called me and I would have come and saved you.”
I said, “I know, but I I needed a little time by myself.”
I’m looking back at the day, wondering where it went wrong. Here’s what I came up with so far:
When I woke up, the day was at my bedside and said, “Good morning, what can I do for you?” I said, “Who are you?” The day’s feelings were hurt, and I didn’t apologize…
I took my pet rhino, Bertrand, for a morning poop walk. Bertrand kept almost going, but couldn’t find the right spot. I let out the slightest sigh of frustration. Bertrand heard and tried to ram me, but missed and hit my neighbor’s Cadillac…
God stopped by. I made God a plate of cheese nachos. God took a bite, spit it out and said, “This cheese tastes old and shitty.” I said, “I’m sorry, but I just bought it this morning.” God said, “Are you challenging my dominion?!” I said, “No, but yeah.”
“Hi, I’m the Moonhead, the gatekeeper of the Wonderama. What’s the Wonderama? Actually, I don’t know because I’m the gatekeeper. I’ve never actually been in the Wonderama.
But those who come out tell me it’s lovely. Why don’t you click on me and I’ll let you in, and you can see for yourself.”
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