Another argument with God

I have a statue of God out in my front yard. I didn’t put it there. God is a good friend of mine and thought I would like it and had it delivered. It’s fourteen feet tall and made of brass.

The thing is the elements tarnished the brass over time and it ended up looking crappy. I spent two days scouring the statue with harsh cleansers and stainless steel heavy-weight pads.

God came over the next day, looked at the metal effigy, commenting I was lucky to have such a good friend who would give me such a shiny statue. I mentioned that, yes, I have a good friend, and the statue shined due to my efforts. God said I embarrassed myself in my false claim to the effulgence.

I kicked over the statue. God told me to pick it back up. I refused. God struggled to right the metallic likeness and gave up due to a strained back muscle.