Sometimes I need advice

I felt stuck in my life and went to seek advice from the Big Rock. You get to The Big Rock by walking for three and a half miles through the South end of Boundary Tree Park.

As I walked, I was suddenly joined by Filger the Squirrel. Filger asked if I was going to talk with The Big Rock. I said I was. Filger said she was just as good as The Big Rock, maybe even better, and I couldn’t go wrong by asking her my question instead. I stopped and asked my question to Filger the Squirrel. Filger thought about it and said she didn’t have an answer. So I went on walking by myself.

On the way I came upon Small Rock. Small Rock is a fist-sized rock wedged between the dirt and a Eucalyptus tree root. Small Rock doesn’t speak words but hums. You can ask Small Rock a question, but the answer will be a hum and you have to interpret it, and my experience is if I’m feeling overwhelmed, I don’t have the capacity for interpretation. So I nodded at Small Rock and kept walking.

A little further along the path, I came upon Bousim the Bobcat. Bousim was laying underneath a mulberry bush. I stopped to pet Bousim’s head. Bousim started to purr. The purr calmed me somewhat. But not enough, and I kept walking.

A few hundred yards up I met up with a forest fire. The forest fire glared at me. I nodded and winked. The forest fire smiled and parted so I could pass through. There’s something about a nod and a wink that reduces the chance for mayhem.

Finally I came to The Big Rock. There were a few others in a line ahead of me. A cartoon dog, 2 rabbis, and a hardback copy of The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.

I whistled while I waited. I’m a good whistler. I actually get paid to whistle for large crowds at auditoriums around the world. I said “actually” because I still can’t believe it.