Constructing the Day Out of Scratch

I woke up feeling flat. It was hard to get motivated. So I laid in bed.

By noon my bed said, “Seriously, when are you going to get up? I need my rest.”

I got out of bed and stood. There was no place to go and I didn’t want to lay back down a piss off the bed.

The sun peaked through the window. The sun said, “I’m sad that you’re not outside enjoying my new rays.”

I went outside. The rays felt good on my body. But then I saw that my neighbor was standing in his driveway looking at me uncomfortably because I was still in my underwear.

I went back into my house and sat on the couch. I was there for a few hours when the couch said, “Um, it kind of hurts when you sit in one place for too long. Could you at least move around?”

I got up and went to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and gazed. The lettuce said, “You’re making me uncomfortable with your staring.”

I looked at the clock on the wall. It said 4:13. I took the clock off the wall and took it apart. I put the pieces back together and it was now a duck. I’m good at rearranging.