Vacation Surprises

Today I went to Michigan on vacation. I rented a house on the lake. This afternoon I went down to the water and jumped in for a swim. I was pulled in by the undertow. The force was so powerful that I went 150 feet to the bottom of the lake.

While I was at the lake’s bottom I met Neptune. I was surprised because I didn’t expect a celebrity citing. It was strange because I’ve seen and met a lot of celebrities in the past. My dad was the director of Hollywood Squares, the TV game show. He used to often take me with him to work. I met Phyllis Diller, Charlie Weaver, Jack Benny, Buddy Hackett, Za Za Gabor just to name a few. They liked me because I laughed at everything they did.

Because of my history, I wasn’t nervous when I met Neptune. I went right up to him and shook his hand. I think he was surprised that I wasn’t nervous.

I said, “I love what you do with the lake. Somedays there’s the big waves, other times it’s tranquil, and then there’s the typhoons. I love your spontaneity.”

Neptune said, “Why thank you. That means a lot to me.”

I said, “Do you ever hire assistants?”

Neptune said, “What are your qualifications?”

I said, “I like fish. My astrological sign is Pisces. I don’t mind getting wet.”

I got hired and I start Monday morning. Isn’t that the funniest thing? I took time off from my work as a cement mixer and I find a brand new job. You never know what’s going to happen next.