There goes a star

I’ve screwed up a lot. I’ve also done some okay things. I tend to think I screw up more than I do okay things. My guess is that I do an equal amount of both.

Even still, I wish I only did okay things, and was honored for such. People would see me and say, “Wow, he’s okay.”

The thing is, it’s hard to be seen. Everyone sees themselves primarily. Everyone else is periphery. We’re backround actors to each other’s stardom.

Still, I hope to be seen. It’s similar in experience to when I was a kid and while sitting in a chair, tried to lift the chair off the ground. I hoped I could do it. If I only tried hard enough.

I think I’ll be content to being my own star. I’ll bask in my glory. I’ll think, “Wow, there he goes. I can’t believe I’m seeing him in person. Wait until I tell myself about it.”