From One Thing to Another

I was hired by The Rolling Stones to clutter bust. The band’s stuff filled three large rooms. There were pieces of stage props, costumes, old instruments, tapes of concerts and studio recordings. I asked the band if they were going to use any of these things anymore. Mick Jagger, the singer, said probably not. I asked if that meant they could let this stuff go. The band took a vote and said yes.

I moved all the Rolling Stones old stuff into my truck, saying that I would take it to a charity for donation. They thanked me, wrote me a check, and I drove away.

The thing is, I’m a big fan of the band, so of course I couldn’t help but bring all their old stuff home. The Stones paraphernalia filled my house. It became difficult to move around. The hardest part was that I couldn’t enjoy any of these things because I didn’t have the space to take anything out and look at it. I became sullen and stopped taking showers.

At the height of my despair, my dog Rexy, who is also my company’s receptionist, said to me, “You’d better get your head out of your ass, because The Who heard what a great job you did for the Stones, and they’ve booked you to help them clutter bust their stuff tomorrow morning at 10 am.”

This gave me the strength to snap back and move all the Stones old stuff to the dumpsters outside. I wanted to start fresh so I could have room for all the Who’s old crap.