I’m nice now. But I used to be an asshole. I remember once getting a bumper sticker made up that said, “Honk if you love Satan.” I put it on my back bumper. Then on Sunday morning around nine am I got in the fast lane on Lake Shore Drive (the local freeway) where the speed limit is 50 mph and I would go 25 mph. People behind me would be on their way to church. They would want to honk, but couldn’t. I could see it in the driver’s faces in my rear view mirror. Their cheeks would be red and they looked like they were going to explode. In retrospect I don’t feel badly about what I did, because I helped them test their faith.

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