New Job

I recently got a job playing baseball for the Chicago Cubs. I’m a designated hitter. It’s kind of fun because I get paid to hit a ball. Plus, I’m kind of lazy, so it’s nice to spend lots of time sitting in the dugout waiting. When it’s my turn, I stand, pick up a bat and walk to the plate. It’s exciting to look out onto the field. I can never figure out how they get the grass so bright green. I pay my landscaper a lot of money to make my lawn look that good and it always comes out a kind of tired pastel greenish amalgam.

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